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Showing posts with label religious joke. Show all posts
Showing posts with label religious joke. Show all posts

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Honest Wood cutter

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A Woodcutter Loses his Axe  Lord Offers him Both Gold & Silver
but He takes his Own Axe  Seeing his Honesty Lord gives him All 3.

One day he goes Again to the Forest with his Wife. But his Wife Falls into The River, he Cries and Pleads to the  Lord to give him his Wife back.
Lord brings Out Angelina Jolie & Asked
'Is this your Wife'
He Replied - Yes.!
Lord said 'you Lied and you are  gonna be Punished'
He Said 'wait ...Lord I Lied because if I had Said No, You Would have taken out Cameron Diaz.
If Then I said no, you Would have taken Out My Wife and Seeing my Honesty, You Would have Given me All 3.
But I m a Poor Man, I Can't keep All 3. So I said Yes to Angelina.
God: You are going to make me cry. Take Angelina

Moral: Men are Honest Liars. ;)


Saturday, December 24, 2011

Who wants to go to heaven

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A pastor at a frontier church ended a stirring sermon with, "All those who want to go to heaven, put up your hands!"

Everybody enthusiastically raised their hands.... everybody except a grizzled old cowboy who had been slouching against the door post at the back of the room.

All heads turned as he sauntered up to the front, spurs jangling and said, "Preacher, that was too easy. How do you know if these folks are serious? I can guarantee to prove who really means it and who don't!"

Bemused the preacher said, "Ok, stranger, go ahead and put the faith of these good people to the test. Ask them anything you want."

At that, the cowpoke pulled his twin six-shooters, turned to the audience and said, "Alright... who wants to go to heaven... raise your hands!"

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