Laugh A Bit

7. Indian Hell

Where is my money?

Three friends went to a hotel.the bill was Rs 75/-

each one contributed Rs.25/-.

the waiter took the bill to the cashier.

the cashier was happy & decided to give them a discount of Rs.5/- & said the waiter to return them Rs.5/-.

but he was confused how to distribute Rs 5 among 3 persons.

he kept Rs 2 in his pocket & gave one rupee to each one of the 3 persons.

so 1st each one contributed 25 Rs now as they are given 1 rupee back their contibution reduces to Rs 24.

they all contributed rs 24 that is 24x3=72 & 2 rupees are in the waiters pocket.

the total becomes 74 but they paid rs 75.

where is the remaining 1 rupee?.

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7. Indian Hell

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

X Ray Glasses

Banta goes to the local novelty shop and finds a pair of x-ray glasses. He checks them out, and isn't fully convinced, but as usual, the store assistant comes along and closes the deal.

On his way home, Banta puts on his new x-ray glasses and, bingo! He sees everyone in the street naked. He takes them off for a moment, and everyone has their clothes on. Puts the glasses back on... everyone is naked! "Cool!"

As he arrives back home, he is eager to show his new toy to his wife, Preeto, but can't find her. He goes up to the bedroom and finds his wife and one of his colleagues, naked in bed. He takes his glasses off, and the two are still naked. He puts them back on, and they are still naked.

Banta then says, "Damn, I just paid fifty bucks for these, and they're already broken!"

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7. Indian Hell

Money for sex

An Australian guy decides to travel to Mauritius. He walks into a bar and Jill (the Australian Barmaid) takes his order, Fosters, and notices his accent.

Over the course of the night they get to know each other quite well. At the end of Jill's shift he asks her if she wants to come back to his place and have sex with him.

Although she is attracted to him she says no. He then offers to pay her $200 for sex. Jill is traveling the world and because she is short of funds she agrees.

The next night the guy turns up again, orders Fosters and after showing her plenty of attention throughout the night he asks if she will sleep with him again for $200. Jill remembers the night before and is only too happy to agree.

This goes on for 5 nights. On the 6th night the guy comes in, orders Fosters and sits in the corner. Jill thinks that may be she should pay him more attention and may be she can then shake some more cash out of him again.

So she goes over and sits next to him. She asks him where he's from in Australia and he tells her Melbourne.

"So am I... What suburb in Melbourne?"

"Glen Iris" he replies.

"That's amazing..." she says, "...so am I - what Street?"

"Cameo Street" he replies.

"This is unbelievable..." she says, "... what number?"

He says, "Number 20" and she is totally astonished.

"You are not going to believe this but I'm from Number 22 and my parents still live there!"

"I know..." he says, "...your Father gave me $1,000 to give to you"

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Sunday, May 15, 2011

One Month Over Due

Mr. Sharma comes home one night, and his wife throws her arms around his neck: "I have great news: I'm a month overdue. I think we're going to have a baby!

The doctor gave me a test today, but until we find out for sure, we can't tell anybody."

The next day, Mrs. Sharma receives a telephone call from Reliance Energy because the electricity bill has not been paid.

" Am I speaking to Mrs. Sharma? "

"Yes... speaking"

Reliance guy, "You're a month overdue, you know!"

"How do YOU know?" stammers the young woman.

"Well, ma'am, it's in our files!" says the Reliance guy.

"What are you saying? It's in your files ...HOW?????"

" Yes ............ . We have a system of finding out who's overdue "

" GOD!!!!!!... ...... This is too much........ .."

"Madam, I am sorry... I am following orders.... I have to inform you are overdue"

"I know that ... let me talk to my husband about this tonight. .... He will speak to your company tomorrow "

That night, she tells her husband about the incident, and he, mad as a bull, rushes to Reliance office the next day morning.

"What's going on? You have it on file that my wife is a month overdue? What business is that of yours?" the husband shouts.

"Just calm down," says the lady at the reception at Reliance, "it's nothing serious. All you have to do is pay us."

"PAY you? And if I refuse?"

"Well, in that case, sir, we'd have no option but to cut yours off."

"And what would my wife do then?" the husband asks.

"I don't know. I guess she'd have to use a candle."

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7. Indian Hell

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Why do people love their wives

1. It is difficult to understand GOD. He makes such beautiful things as women..and then he turns them into Wives !?!!!?

2. It takes thousand workers to build a castle , Million soldiers to protect a country BUT Just ONE woman to make a Happy HOME! Let's Thank ...... the KAAMWALI ( House maid)

3. First Soldier: "What made U go into the army?"
Second Soldier: "I had no wife and I loved war. What about you?"
First Soldier: "Well, I had a wife and loved peace."

4. They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage it is self-defense

5. A person who surrenders when he's WRONG, is HONEST.
A person who SURRENDERS when not SURE, is WISE.
A person who surrenders even if he's RIGHT, is a HUSBAND.!

6. Its funny when people discuss over "love marriage" and "arranged marriage"It is like asking a person if he would like to "hang himself" or "shoot himself".

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7. Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

8. Wife : Honey ...... What are You Looking for ?

Husband : Nothing.

Wife : Nothing...?? U've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour ...??
Husband : I was just looking for the expiry date

9. After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband,
"You know, I was a fool when I married you."
The husband replied,
"Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."

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10. A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted."
The next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same: "You can have mine."

11. A woman was telling her friend, "I made my husband a millionaire." And what was he before you married him?" asked the friend. "A billionaire." she replied,

12. Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

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7. Indian Hell

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Girls First time

As you lie back your muscles tighten. You put him off for a while searching for an excuse, but he refuses to be swayed as he approaches you.
He asks if you're afraid and you shake your head bravely. He has had more experience, but it's the first time his finger has found the right place.
He probes deeply and you shiver; your body tenses; but he's gentle like he promised he'd be.
He looks deeply within your eyes and tells you to trust him-he's done this many times before.
His cool smile relaxes you and you open wider to give him more room for an easy entrance. You begin to plead and beg him to hurry, but he slowly takes his time, wanting to cause you as little pain as possible. As he presses closer, going deeper, you feel the tissue give way; pain surges throughout your body and you feel the slight trickle of blood as he continues.
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He looks at you concerned and asks you if it's too painful. Your eyes are filled with tears but you shake your head and nod for him to go on. He begins going in and out with skill but you are now too numb to feel him within you.
After a few moments, you feel something bursting within you and he pulls it out of you, you lay panting, glad to have it over. He looks at you and smiling warmly, tells you, with a chuckle; that you have been his most stubborn yet most rewarding experience.
You smile and thank your dentist. After all, it was your first time to have a tooth pulled.
Naughty, Naughty!
Excuse me, What were you thinkin'? -->

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7. Indian Hell